On the Journey Towards Accepting my Anger

Recently, I got angry in public. That still feels like an accomplishment to me-to express anger rather than focus it inwards. I just wish I knew how to do it better. I tend to store up anger until I can say it 'right' or do the 'right' thing. Sometimes, when I can't control my reactions, I come on way too strong. This is my worst fear-to rage like my father did-but I know that I can express anger without harm. I am working on it.
I know that I am not alone in my community of L'Arche in striving to follow the Christian teaching to speak to my brothers and sisters with truth in love. But what is the truth? And how do we express our truth in a way that the other person can hear it? We can be paralysed by a false idealism that we need to be perfect to be more honest and direct. If we believe this, we end up wounding each other with false kindness.
On my journey toward expressing my anger compassionately, I look for role models. I am inspired by Stephen Lewis, the Canadian who is the U.N. Secretary-General's envoy for HIV/AIDS in Africa, as he rages eloquently against Western passivity in the face of this horrible pandemic. It helps me to see Jesus struggling with anger in the Gospels. Some of my friends with intellectual disabilities inspire me by their example. It takes a true humility; yet in time, with grace, anger expressed with love might liberate us.

- John Guido