No Defence

Before we were married, my husband Derick and I attended the wedding of one of my co-workers. At the reception, Derick, a practical joker, continually tapped his glass (a tradition signalling the new couple to kiss). He intentionally did it when the bride and groom had food in their mouths or were on opposites sides of the room.
After the hundredth time, the groom decided he'd had enough. He walked past his bride, heading straight for us. Derick gathered up silverware to defend himself, but there was no defence against the groom's action - planting a big smooch on my embarrassed husband's cheek.
Nary a tinkle of glass was heard the rest of the reception.

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