Other people need to hear VERBAL EXPRESSIONS of love. They need to hear in concrete terms why their spouse loves them. "I'm glad I married you because..." assures them that their spouse recognizes and appreciates their individuality.
SERVICE is another thing that makes some people feel most loved. These people respond best to affection that is revealed in practical terms: cooking a meal, mowing the lawn, repairing a faucet, running and errand, helping with a distasteful chore. They see acts of service as indicative of what is in their spouse's heart.
GIFTS make still other people feel loved - not because of the cost involved, but because of the personal attention and thought that goes into them. These people enjoy - even need - tangible reminders of their spouse's love.
Finally, SPENDING TIME TOGETHER makes other people feel loved. They don't care particularly what they and their spouses do, as long as they are together. Having their husband or wife commit uninterrupted blocks of time to them assures them they are top priority.
The key is to learn what says "I love you" to your spouse and speak it loudly, clearly, and often.
- Bill Hybels in "Marriage: Building Real Intimacy" study guide
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