True Religion

It is easy enough to be friendly to one's friends. But to befriend the one who regards himself as your enemy is the quintessence of true religion. The other is mere business.

- Mohandas K. Gandhi

Catalyst for Change

The most powerful thing you can do to change the world is to change your own beliefs about the nature of life, people and reality to something more positive...and begin to act accordingly.

- Shakti Gawain

Love

Love that ends is the shadow of love; true love is without beginning or end.

- Hazrat Inayat Khan (1882-1927)

Love in the abstract?

It is not love in the abstract that counts. Men have loved a cause as they have loved a woman. They have loved the brotherhood, the workers, the poor, the oppressed – but they have not loved man; they have not loved the least of these. They have not loved “personally.” It is hard to love. It is the hardest thing in the world, naturally speaking. Have you ever read Tolstoy’s Resurrection? He tells of political prisoners in a long prison train, enduring chains and persecution for the love of their brothers, ignoring those same brothers on the long trek to Siberia. It is never the brothers right next to us, but the brothers in the abstract that are easy to love

- Dorothy Day

True Love

What is TRUE LOVE? The late Father James Keller, founder of The Christophers, put it this way:
Love delights in giving attention rather than attracting it.
Love finds the element of good and builds on it.
Love does not magnify defects.
Love is a flame that warms but never burns.
Love knows how to disagree without becoming disagreeable.
Love rejoices at the success of others instead of being envious.

Life

If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain;
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Into his nest again,
I shall not live in vain.

- Emily Dickinson, from "The Complete Poems of Emily Dickinson" (Boston: Little, Brown, and Company)

Married Couple Make a Mutual Discovery: "You Can't Satisfy Me"

In his book Fill These Hearts, Christopher West describes a surprising and simple discovery that changed his marriage:
Years ago [my wife] and I were out to dinner and she observed that something was different about our marriage in recent years, something good. She asked me if I had any insight into what it was. After reflecting a bit I said with a smile, "Yeah, I think I know what it is. I think I've been realising deep in my heart that you can't satisfy me." She got a big smile on her face and said, "Yeah, that's it. And I've been realising the same thing: you can't satisfy me either." I imagine anyone overhearing us in the restaurant would have thought we were about to get divorced, but to us that realisation was cause for joy and celebration. We had never felt closer and freer in our love.
I love my wife more than words can express, and I know she loves me. But I can't possibly be her ultimate satisfaction, and she can't be mine.
And that's why our conversation at the restaurant was cause for rejoicing. Only to the degree that we stop expecting others to be "god" for us, are we free to love others as they really are, warts and all, without demanding perfection of them, whether a spouse, a friend, a son or daughter, or any other relationship. And only to the degree that we are free from idolising … human beings are we also free to take our ache for perfect fulfillment to the One who alone can satisfy it.

Christopher West, Fill These Hearts (Image, 2012), pp. 159-160

Love

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one...Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket – safe, dark, motionless, airless – it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is hell

- C. S. Lewis

Young Boy Underestimates His Father's Generosity

One time, my dad wanted to congratulate me on something I had accomplished in the sixth grade. He took me to K-Mart and made a wide sweeping gesture with his hand toward the whole store from the entrance. He said, "To congratulate you, I'll buy you anything in this whole store tonight." My eyes widened as I thought of the possibilities.
At the time, I didn't have a full grasp on how money worked or how much money Dad had. So I sort of limited things in my mind. I didn't even look at the huge stereo systems, expensive bikes, or anything that cost more than one hundred dollars. Instead, I chose a cassette tape case that was less than fifty dollars. I was content with just that case. It was more than I could afford myself, for sure, so I chose that one. It was nice. Only many years later did I find out from Dad that he had one thousand dollars cash in his pocket that night. What's more, he brought his cheque book just in case that wasn't enough. In my selection, I limited his blessing in my life.
Imagine how much God has in his pocket for you. You don't ask God for all the spiritual power you could because you forget that you are his child. Like me and my earthly father, you don't realize all he could do for you, in you, and through you.

Steve DeNeff and David Drury, Soul Shift (Wesleyan Publishing House, 2011), p. 55

U.S. Olympian Is Saving Sex until Marriage

Lolo Jones is an Olympic track and field star gunning for gold at the London Games this summer. But you know what's really hard for Jones? Keeping her virginity intact for her future husband, whoever he may be.
On HBO's Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel, Jones talked about her struggles:
It's just something, a gift that I want to give to my husband. But please understand this journey has been hard. If there are virgins out there, I just want to let them know, the hardest thing I've ever done in my life—harder than training for the Olympics, harder than graduating from college—has been to stay a virgin before marriage. Jones adds, "I've been tempted. I've had guys tell me, they're like, 'Hey you know if you have sex it will help you run faster.'" She joked that her response has been: "If you marry me, then yeah."

source unknown

Atheist Flabbergasted by a Church's Love

Patrick Greene of San Antonio, Texas, has had a long history of disliking and combating Christians. At one point Greene, an outspoken local atheist, threatened to sue Henderson County about the yearly manger display at the courthouse. "My wife and I had never had a Christian do anything nice for us," Greene said in a local newspaper interview.
But all of that changed in March of 2012 when the 63-year-old Greene learned that he needed surgery for a detached retina. Greene didn't have money to pay for the surgery, and he had to give up his cab driving job. When Jessica Crye, a member of Sand Springs Baptist Church, heard about Greene's situation, she told her pastor, Eric Graham, who then called Greene. Greene said, "If you really want to contribute something, we need groceries."
Greene thought that if anything, he'd see $50, or at most $100. But a few days later, the church sent a check for $400. More checks soon followed. The flabbergasted Greene said, "I thought I was in the Twilight Zone. These people are acting like what the Bible says a Christian does."
Now, rather than try to remove the manger display, Greene said he would like to add his contribution—a star for the top of the Nativity scene. However, Greene added, "You people can figure out how to plug it in."

Rich Flowers, "Atheist 'flabbergasted' by Christians' assistance," Athens Review 20 March 2012

Father Takes a Needle for His Fearful Son

Recently I was sitting in a doctor's office with one of my young sons, and the nurse wanted to draw blood from him for a test. As you can imagine, he did not want to have blood taken from him. Who does? So he told me, "Dad, I can't do it. I just can't do it."
The nurse said, "Here's the deal, buddy. We've got this numbing spray. We'll spray the numbing spray on you, and then we'll stick the needle in you, and you won't even feel it."
But my son kept saying, "I can't do it. I can't do it."
Finally I said to the nurse, "Ma'am, I know what I'm about to ask you may be out of bounds, but can you stick me first? Can you do it without the numbing spray? I just need to show my son."
She said, "Yes, I'll do it. We'll keep this between us."
So I put my son on my lap, and I said, "Watch Daddy." I rolled up my sleeve and stuck my arm out. Then the nurse stuck me and drew blood. A smile came over my son's face. Yes, he was still a little nervous, but when he saw that Daddy already went through what he was about to go through, with no numbing spray, he stuck his arm out. It gave him courage.
In the same way, when you find yourself in the midst of hard times, look to the place where they drew Jesus' blood. Look to the cross, and there you will find rest for your souls.

Bryan Loritts, from a sermon entitled, "The Great Exchange"

Love Loves You Too

Some people get to make the news
Some people get to say what's true
Everybody's got to find their own way through
But if you love, then love loves you too.

Some people get to fly by night
Some people get to shine a light
Everybody's got to find their way through
But if you love, then love loves you too.

Some of us hunger for the finer things
Some lust for power like ancient kings
Some have to leave behind everything they thought they knew
Some people don't know how much trouble they can brew

Some take the burden of another's pain
Some spend forever for a moment's gain
Everybody's got to find their way through
But if you love, then love loves you too.

from Bruce Cockburn, "Dart to the Heart" (1994)

Fighting for a Troubled Veteran

Here's a positive story about a troubled veteran who was offered compassion and a taste of redemption. After returning from Iraq in 2006, Brad Eifert, a highly-decorated staff sergeant descended into emotional and personal turmoil—divorce, rage, and alcohol abuse. "I just felt totally hopeless in every situation in my life," he said. Eifert's personal disintegration led to a standoff with police, in which Eifert held a pistol to his head and threatened to kill himself and a police officer. Surprisingly, the people involved in his case (including a wise and compassionate judge), banded together to help Eifert rather than just lock him up. Although they did charge him with a lesser felony, they also assigned him a mentor, enforced treatment, and even put a monitor on his ankle that records alcohol consumption. It's a beautiful example of how a community can help change lives through forgiveness, compassion, tough love, mentoring, and accountability.

Woman Idolizes Her Parents' Approval

In his book Counterfeit Gods, Timothy Keller writes, "Idols generate false beliefs such as 'If I cannot achieve X, then my life won't be valid' or, 'Since I have lost or failed at Y, now I can never be happy or forgiven.'" Then he illustrates this point with the following illustration:

A young woman named Mary was an accomplished musician who once attended my church. For many years she had battled mental illness and had checked in and out of psychiatric institutions. She gave me permission as her pastor to speak to her therapist …. "Mary virtually worships her parents' approval of her," her counsellor told me, "and they always wanted her to be a world-class artist. She is quite good, but she's never reached the top of her profession, and she cannot live with the idea that she has disappointed her parents."

Medications helped to manage her depression, but they could not get to the root of it. Her problem was a false belief, driven by an idol. She told herself, "If I cannot be a well-known violinist, I have let down my parents, and my life is a failure." She was distressed and guilty enough to die. When Mary began to believe the gospel, that she was saved by grace, not by musicianship, and that, "though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord shall take me in" (Psalm 27:10), she began to get relief from her idolatrous need for her parents' approval. In time her depression and anxiety began to lift, and she was able to re-enter her life and musical career.

 

Timothy Keller, Counterfeit Gods (Dutton, 2009), pp. 148-149

Chris Seay's Father Demonstrates How to Love the "Unlovely"

In his book The Gospel According to Jesus, Chris Seay mentions a profound lesson he learned from his father about loving the "bad people":
Growing up, we didn't have a lot of money, so we used to get outfield deck seats (aka "the cheap seats") to see the baseball games at the [Houston] Astrodome. Most of the people buying the cheap seats did so to save more money for beer. After the first few innings, they were drunk, and by the time the seventh-inning stretch rolled around, there would be beer mixed with peanut shells on the floor, spilled beer down your back, and a brawl two rows over and back to the left. It was ugly out there. As a kid, I learned from a lot people that we were sitting with the "bad people."
There was one consistent drunk fan named Batty Bob. He was a self-proclaimed Houston Astros mascot. He'd come to all the games wearing a rainbow wig, and he'd lead slurred cheers in the stands. I remember one time my dad went out to sit and talk with Batty Bob. He spent the whole game with Bob, then walked him out to the parking lot to bring him home with us. I was more than confused, because this guy was one of the "bad people."
When we got home, my dad came to me and explained how God loved Batty Bob. I remember thinking, Really? Batty Bob? And he stayed with us for a few days to get back on his feet. This is when I started to realise that God did not despise these people; he dearly loved them.

Chris Seay, The Gospel According to Jesus (Thomas Nelson, 2011), p. 147

Father Responds to His Son's Rant about the Church

At one point in his journey towards Christ, Nathan Foster (the son of author Richard Foster) was living "a ragged attempt at discipleship." He was afraid to share his honest thoughts about God and his disillusionment with the church, especially with a father who had given his life to serve God and the church.

But one day as Nathan shared a ride with his dad on a ski lift, he blurted out, "I hate going to church. It's nothing against God; I just don't see the point." Richard Foster quietly said, "Sadly, many churches today are simply organised ways of keeping people from God."

Surprised by his dad's response, Nathan launched into "a well-rehearsed, cynical rant" about the church:

Okay, so since Jesus paid such great attention to the poor and disenfranchised, why isn't the church the world's epicenter for racial, social and economic justice? I've found more grace and love in worn-out folks at the local bar than those in the pew … . And instead of allowing our pastors to be real human beings with real problems, we prefer some sort of overworked rock stars.

His dad smiled and said, "Good questions, Nate. Overworked rock stars: that's funny. You've obviously put some thought into this." Once again, Nathan was surprised that his "rant" didn't faze his dad. "He didn't blow me off or put me down." From that point on Nathan actually looked forward to conversations with his dad.

It also proved to be a turning point in his spiritual life. By the end of the winter, Nathan was willing to admit,

Somewhere amid the wind and snow of the Continental Divide, I decided that if I'm not willing to be an agent of change [in the church], my critique is a waste … . Regardless of how it is defined, I was learning that the church was simply a collection of broken people recklessly loved by God … . Jesus said he came for the sick, not the healthy, and certainly our churches reflect that.

Spurred on by his father's acceptance and honesty and by his own spiritual growth, Nathan has continued to ask honest questions, but he has also started to love and change the church, rather than just criticise it.

Nathan Foster, Wisdom Chaser (IVP Books, 2010), pp. 85-89

A Father's Risk and a Mother's Love

In a short devotional for Christian Standard magazine, Paul Williams writes about an unusually bumpy flight he once had from Philadelphia to Long Island. Being a frequent flyer, Williams wasn't all that concerned as the plane was batted around in the sky. Others, however, were grabbing onto their armrests or steadying themselves on the seat back in front of them. While observing the reactions of his fellow passengers, Williams took notice of one young mother caring for her baby. He watched as she "wrapped her arms around her infant and pulled the child very close to her breast. Then she dropped her chin, rested it on the back of the child's head, and began to sing ever so quietly, 'Hush, Little Baby.'" The moment caused him to reflect on Christmas, of all things. He writes:
Helpless fragility is the lot of the infant. Those early days leave a lasting impression on the human psyche we never really resolve. That vulnerability stays with us all of our days, reminding us of the seemingly capricious nature of things—a bitter world that does not care if we exist.
But then God came—as an infant, unable to reach out and steady himself on the seat back in front of him, fully trusting a human, fallible mother to pull him close to her breast through the pitching, shaking nature of things.
What an extraordinary risk, to trust the infant of God to a frightened young girl.
But then again—watching that new mother sing to her child all the way through the turbulent skies to the welcoming runway—I realized God knew good and well what he was doing. The power of love trumps fear, rewards risk, and brings meaning and life to an otherwise frightening world. Over and over again.
For a God who would become powerless for love, and to a mother who sings softly in her infant's ear, I give my heart for Christmas, wholly amazed at the wonder of it all.

Winning a Son's Heart

In his book The Masculine Mandate, pastor and author Richard D. Phillips writes of his meaningful relationship with his father. In 1972, Phillips was just 12-years-old when his father was sent to Vietnam. The only way he and his father could communicate was through letters. He writes:

One of the most powerful memories is the thrill of the letter I would receive from my father almost every week …. Recalling my personal letters from Dad practically brings me to tears even now. He would simply begin by telling me about his life. Not big military issues, but "neat stuff" that happened or that he saw. Then he would talk to me about my life, writing things like this: "Dear Ricky, I heard you had a great baseball game and made a great catch. Your mother told me how exciting it was when you won. How I wish I could have been there, but I can see you making that catch in my mind." …

Do you see what [my dad] was doing? My dad was telling me that I was his boy and that his heart was fully engaged with me, even from halfway around the world …. In the midst of a life-and-death war zone, with all the weighty responsibilities of a senior Army officer, my father was truly absorbed in my life. And I knew it. So when he said to me, in effect, "My son, give me your heart," he had already given every bit of his heart to me, his boy. I couldn't possibly help giving my heart back to him.

Richard D. Phillips, The Masculine Mandate (Reformation Trust, 2010), pp. 97-98

Learning to Love

At the end of a long letter, C. S. Lewis wrote: "When I have learnt to love God better than my earthly dearest, I shall love my earthly dearest better than I do now. Insofar as I learn to love my earthly dearest at the expense of God and instead of God, I shall be moving toward the state in which I shall not love my earthly dearest at all. When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed but increased.