A (Belated) Christmas Surprise

A woman was taking a shower when her 2-year-old son came into the bathroom and wrapped himself in toilet paper.
Although he made a mess, he looked adorable, so she ran for her camera and took a few shots. They came out so well that she had copies made and included one with each of their family Christmas cards.
Days later, a relative called about the picture, laughing hysterically, and suggesting she take a closer look. Puzzled, she stared at the photo and was shocked to discover that in addition to her son, she had captured her own reflection in the mirror - wearing nothing but a camera!

A Voice from a Different Time

I speak as a citizen of the world, for the world as it stands aghast at the path we have taken. I speak as an American to the leaders of my own nation. The great initiative in this war is ours. The initiative to stop it must be ours.

- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr -

The Big Bang

Astronomers were excited this week at having isolated a brief sound which occurred immediately before the Big Bang. Apparently, that sound was "Uh oh."

Diet Logic

Here is the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting medical studies. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than do the British or Americans. The French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
Conclusion: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

Patriotism

In the days ahead we must not consider it unpatriotic to raise certain basic questions about our national character. We must begin to ask, 'Why are there forty million poor people in a nation overflowing with such unbelievable affluence? Why has our nation placed itself in the position of being God's military agent on earth...? Why have we substituted the arrogant undertaking of policing the whole world for the high task of putting our own house in order?'

- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr -

The mystery of Divine Revelation

The great mystery of the divine revelation is that God entered into intimacy with us not only by Christ’s coming, but by His leaving.
- Henri Nouwen -

I wish...

For one night,
I wish to dine and dance with kings
to experience royalty.

For one journey,
I wish to stand on the moon
to see the Earthrise.

For one season,
I wish to soar with the Eagles
to feel the freedom of flight.

For one day,
I wish for a spirit
filled with peace.

For a millennium and beyond,
I pray for violence to end.
For a millennium and beyond,
I pray for illness and pain to disappear.
For a millennium and beyond,
I pray that poverty and wealth would have no distinction.
For a millennium and beyond,
I pray for all of mankind to
be filled with the true spirit of Peace.

Three Animals and an Argument

Three animals were having a huge argument over who was the best: The first, a hawk, claimed that because of his ability to fly, he could attack anything repeatedly from above, and his prey had nary a chance. The second, a lion, based his claim on his strength, and none in the forest dared to challenge him. The third, a skunk, insisted he needed neither flight nor strength to frighten off any creature. As the trio debated the issue, a grizzly bear came along and swallowed them all: hawk, lion and stinker!

Worth thinking about

Writing about the spiritual life is like making prints from negatives ... Often it is the dark forest that makes us speak about the open field. Frequently prison makes us think about freedom, hunger helps us to appreciate food, and war gives us words for peace. Not seldom are our visions of the future born out of the sufferings of the present and our hope for others born out of our own despair. Only few “happy endings” make us happy, but often someone’s careful and honest articulation of the ambiguities, uncertainties, and painful conditions of life give us new hope. The paradox is indeed that new life is born out of the pains of the old.

- Henri Nouwen, Reaching Out -

Valuing the gift

Be thankful for the smallest blessing, and you will deserve to receive greater. Value the least gifts no less than the greatest, and simple graces as especial favours. If you remember the dignity of the Giver, no gift will seem small or mean, for nothing can be valueless that is given by the most high God.

- Thomas à Kempis, 1380-1471 -

Friendly Obstacles

For every hill I've had to climb
For every stone that bruised my feet
For all the blood and sweat and grime
For blinding storms and burning heat
My heart sings but a grateful song....
These were the things that made me strong.

For all the heartaches and the tears
For all the anguish and the pain
For gloomy days and fruitless years
And for the hopes that lived in vain
I do give thanks for now I know
These were the things that helped me grow!

'Tis not the softer things of life
Which stimulate man's will to strive
But bleak adversity and strife
Do most to keep man's will alive
O'er rose-strewn paths the weaklings creep
But brave hearts dare to climb the steep.

- Author Unknown

(Yet More) Rare and Strange Thoughts

Is a computer virus covered by Medicare??
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
There is no point in being pessimistic, it probably wouldn't work anyway.
Did you hear about the clumsy lens grinder? He fell into the lens grinding machine and made a spectacle of himself.
Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving to where you can't find them.

(Still More) Rare and Strange Thoughts

Why is it that you must wait until night to call it a day??
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to??
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too??
Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.

(More) Rare and Strange Thoughts

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Disneyland: A people trap operated by a mouse.
What did the Egyptians do when it got dark? They turned on the Israelites.
What happened to the thief who stole a calendar? He got twelve months....
What is cowhide most used for? Holding cows together....

Rare (and Strange) Thoughts

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.
His money is twice tainted; 'taint yours and 'taint mine - Mark Twain
The secret to creativity is ... knowing how to hide your sources - Albert Einstein
If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Happiness

Realise that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.

- Og Mandino -

Be Thankful

Be thankful for the smallest blessing, and you will deserve to receive greater. Value the least gifts no less than the greatest, and simple graces as especial favours. If you remember the dignity of the Giver, no gift will seem small or mean, for nothing can be valueless that is given by the most high God.

- Thomas à Kempis, 1380-1471 -

Psalm 23: Antithesis

The clock is my dictator, I shall not rest.
It makes me lie down only when exhausted.
It leads me to deep depression.
It hounds my soul.
It leads me in circles of frenzy for activity's sake.
Even though I run frantically from task to task,
I will never get it all done.
For my "ideal" is with me.
Deadlines and my need for approval, they drive me.
They demand performance from me, beyond the limits of my schedule.
They anoint my head with migraines.
My in-basket overflows.
Surely fatigue and time pressure shall follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the bonds of frustration forever.

I Hate to Spoil it For You. . .

• Cinderella's slippers were originally made out of fur. The story was changed in the 1600s by a translator error.
• It was the left shoe that Aschenputtel (Cinderella) lost at the stairway, when the prince tried to follow her.
• In Casablanca, Humphrey Bogart never said "Play it again, Sam."
• Sherlock Holmes never said "Elementary, my dear Watson."
• Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.
• Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
• Dr. Seuss coined the word "nerd" in his 1950 book "If I Ran the Zoo"

A Prayer

God help us
To rise up from our struggle.
Like a tree rises up from the soil.
Our roots reaching down into our trouble,
Our rich, dark dirt of existence.
Finding nourishment deeply
And holding us firmly.
Always connected.
Growing upwards and into the sun.
Amen.

from Leunig, The Prayer Tree

The Ways of God

God often gives in one brief moment that which he has for a long time denied
- Thomas À Kempis -

Creativity

Creativity, as has been said, consists largely of rearranging what we know in order to find out what we do not know... Hence, to think creatively, we must be able to look afresh at what we normally take for granted.
- George Kneller -

Searching...

A neighbour found Nasruddin on his hands and knees.
“What are you searching for, friend?”
“My key.”
Both men got on their knees to search.
After a while, the neighbour asked,
“Where did you lose them?”
“At home.”
“Good Lord! Why are you searching here?”
“Because it’s brighter here.”
Search for God where you lost Him.

from Anthony de Mello,
The Song of the Bird

Just one

I am only one but still I am one. I cannot do everything but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything let me not refuse to do the something that I can do
- Edward Everett Hale -

Give up and go

I want you to give up what you think you know and open to what you do not yet know. I want you to recognise and live in your spirit. I want you to burn up your past and live for what life may yet bring you - for the revelations it will bring you, if you dare to live for them.

- Andrew Harvey -

Evening Prayer

Now that dusk is near -
with parrots in the gum trees
lessening their chatter,
with the distant roar of cars
fading to a mere murmur -
may I hear
the voice of the One
who walks in the garden
in the cool of the evening
and, in hearing that voice,
find a little of the Eden-peace
which some day will be perfected.
This I pray
in the name of Him
who was once mistaken for a gardener

- Bruce Prewer, "God of the evening"

Spiritual Disciplines at Work?!

A nun joined a convent which had a rule of silence; she was permitted to say only two words a year. The first year she came to Mother Superior and said "Bed hard". Mother Superior thanked her and promised to get her a softer mattress. The second year the nun came to the Mother Superior and said, "Food cold". Again Mother Superior thanked her and said she would look into the matter. The third year the nun came to the Mother Superior and said "I'm leaving". Mother Superior said, "I'm not surprised. All you've done since you've arrived is complain, complain, complain."

Saints

Once someone approached a disciple of the Muslim mystic Bahaudin Naqshband and said, “Tell me why your Master conceals his miracles. I have personally collected data that shows beyond doubt that he has been present in more than one place at a time; that he healed people by the power of his prayers but tells them it was the work of nature; that he helped people in their troubles and then attributes it to their good luck. Why does he do this?”
“I know exactly what you are talking about,” said the disciple, “for I have observed these things myself. And I think I can give you the answer to your question. First, the Master recoils from being the centre of attention. And secondly, he is convinced that once people develop an interest in the miraculous, they have no desire to learn anything of true spiritual value.”

from Anthony de Mello, Prayer of the Frog

Communication Australian style

There is something about us Australians that prefers to communicate in silences rather than words. Perhaps we are defeated by it all, tongue-tied in the presence of ultimate things. Perhaps we feel safer with the great things left unsaid, meaning them only in the silence: we, the inarticulate, offering our homage to the ineffable. Ultimate truths are not to be captured in any expression. They are not the exclusive possession of anyone; nor are they merely to be taken on anyone's authority. For someone to really know these things is to keep a decent reserve, to hold what is sacred in silence.

- Tony Kelly, A New Imagining

Dreams

"When will I be enlightened?"
"When you see," the Master said
"See what?"
"Trees and Flowers and moon and stars."
"But I see these every day"
"No. What you see is paper trees, paper flowers, paper moons and paper stars. For you live, not in reality, but in your words and thoughts."
"And for good measure", he added gently, "you life a paper life, alas, and will die a paper death"

from Anthony de Mello,
One Minute Wisdom.